


CYMFH Fan Ending

by SmellyCats



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Edvin Made Me Read It, Extreme Emotional Abuse, I Realized I'm A Loner, I'm Just A Sad Potato, M/M, Solice, Why Do I Hurt Myself So?, i cried
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-08
Updated: 2017-05-08
Packaged: 2018-10-29 12:32:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,583
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10854069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SmellyCats/pseuds/SmellyCats
Summary: After Jefferson grows old and fulfills his duties as father, he reminisces his times with his family and Alexander's death.





	CYMFH Fan Ending

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Cause You're My Favourite Hue](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/289236) by Queen of Misfortune. 



> In order to gain context for this oneshot, go read 'Cause You're My Favourite Hue' on Tumblr. This is the link: http://jamiiton.tumblr.com/post/153805037038/cymfh-masterpost Please read this fic, it's a wonderful thing. And also, this is my first fanfiction, so please don't be angry with me if I do something wrong, just tell me what my mistake was.

Thomas gazed up at his children, their worried expressions left him clueless as to what was really going on. His vision was like a tunnel, everything blurred except for the one true tangible thing in his life. Family. Slowly, the world around him came into focus, he was laying down on a hard bed with needles poked into his arms, he could feel the sensation of his son’s hand on his own. Angelica pushed a stray gray curl out of Thomas’ face. Everything seemed so surreal, all of his thoughts were jumbled and twisted, they couldn’t escape their prison in order to inform Thomas of anything. In that moment he felt and knew nothing. The simplicity of it all made Thomas grin.   
That simplicity did not last however, all his surroundings registered at once, sending him into a massive headache. Thomas was laying in a hospital bed, the air was thick with the scent of disinfectant. Gurneys were rolling around outside of his room and some people were shouting, crying, or simply stomping around. For what exactly, Thomas could not fathom. All he knew was that he was in a hospital with his three darling children at his side.  
“Dad? Are you awake? Do you know where you are or what’s going on?” Philip asked with a troubled expression on his face, his eyebrows furrowed.   
“No, please fill me in...” Jefferson could barely manage to choke out constricted words for some odd reason. His vocal chords felt shriveled and broken.  
“Dad, the doctor said-,” Philip’s breath hitched and he began to cry, “you won’t make it this time, your health has deteriorated far too much and your esophagol cancer has spread.”  
Thomas reached towards Philip’s face to wipe his tears away with his frail, bony hand. Thomas took this time to be sentimental and remember his cherished memories of his children. However, he was soon run over with a sense of emptiness when he remembered the days when his beloved husband was there. Alex was his world, when he died his world blew up into an oblivion. Even so, him and their children along with Eliza managed to pick up the pieces and paste them together. There would always be that big gaping hole Where Alex used to be, even then they still managed a fulfilling and happy life with the solace of knowing Alex will always be watching them. Every day was spent making Alex proud. There was the lonliness, the lack of motivation to live, yet there was also the beautiful and precious time spent with Angelica, Mary, and Philip.   
He watched his children grow into amazing people, although Alex was not physically there and did not get to grow old with Thomas, he knew that one day he too would see his beloved Alex and get to tell him of all their accomplishments, hopefully, Alex would be proud. Thomas spent his life making sure that when he died and got to see Alexander again, he would know he had a life lived for the both of them. He wanted to see the look of pride on his husband’s face as they were reunited.   
Thomas was snapped out of his daze by Mary breaking down on top of him, her body rattled as she cried tears of sorrow all over his gray blanket.   
“Shh, it’s okay Mary. I may not be there physically but I will always be watching you. All of you children will be watched tenderly by me and your daddy.”  
“I don’t want to be watched dad, I want you there with me, I want you to hug me when I’m sad, give me advice when I need it, tell me stories about Alexander over and over again ‘till I can recite them word-for-word. I need you.” Mary threw her head back and let out a blood curdling wail. Thomas’ heart sank, everyone was so sad, he could feel it in the air. The room was thick with sorrow   
“When your daddy died, I didn’t know what to do with myself, I cried long hours, I blamed myself, my entire reason for existing had died in my arms. I wanted him back so desperately, I drove myself into a deep depression. I almost commited suicide. All I knew was that I wanted the love of my life back and nothing else, I didn’t realise the consequences of my actions, nor the effect it would have on you kids. Before I pulled that trigger, I heard Alex’s voice, he told me to stop, think, realize what I was doing. It took a long time for me to accept his passing, but you kids, you helped me through it. I would be nothing without you, I wouldn’t even be here without you. You children gave me a sense of restitution. A reason to live. I never gave up after that, even at the most heartbreaking moments, the hardest, or the saddest, I never gave up. I wanted to make your daddy proud. I wanted you kids to grow up into the best people you could be. So just because of my passing, don’t be sad, continue to be the best people you can be. I believe in all of you, I know you can all have long, fulfilling lives without me. Watch your children grow, pass on your knowledge to them, love them and cherish them and never take anything you have for granted. Love your significant other like every day is the last day you see them. Take the road less travelled, go on an inspiring, amazing adventure. Make your life worth living. And just know that I am so proud of you all, and I am always there to listen when you need to talk to me.”   
In that moment Thomas felt the energy to talk for hours. However, all great adventures must come to an end. Thomas was sad that he was leaving his children, he wasn’t ready to go, yet at the same time, he felt he’d done enough, they needed to learn to move on with their lives, to grow as people.   
Thomas was feeling himself slowly slip away, his vision started to blur, as final words he muttered, “Live happily...” and then his world turned upside down.  
Thomas was gazing into the vibrant, brown eyes of his husband. A feeling of warmth filled him, an endless flow of tears streamed out of his eyes. Thomas felt whole again, his world had no more holes, he was his complete self, the sorrow that was set aside came out in one foul swoop. He couldn’t keep his hands to himself. He touched his husband’s face to make sure it was real, every touch felt like electricity. It had been seventy years since he’d last seen Alexander. The feeling of his husband filled him with indescribable joy. Alex grabbed his hand. It wasn’t the phantom feeling of Alex touching him, it wasn’t the false hope of Alex touching him, it was his Alex, his gorgeous other half touching his hand. A silly grin that stretched from ear to ear slapped onto his face. His world was colorful again. His his bed sheets were a light tiel and the room he was in was colored in baby blue.  
He gazed back into Alex’s eyes and he was suddenly flying, he couldn’t see, yet he could feel himself flying quite quickly through a senseless void. He was comforted by the sensation of Alex’s hand in his. Thomas’ senses suddenly came back to him and he was standing on nothing, he could see New York City below him, as if he were standing on glass.   
Thomas’ attention snapped back to the man in front of him. Alex was grinning madly with tear-stained cheeks. Thomas looked at Alexander, his legs betrayed him and he fell to his knees.  
“I missed you so much Alex-”  
“I know, I know.” Alex said in between sobs.  
“I did as you said, I raised our children for me and you, I lived for you, I lived everyday knowing that when I woke up you wouldn’t be in my arms, but I stayed alive. If you hadn’t helped me through my pain, I never would have had the privilege of watching our children grow. I- ” Thomas looked at his husband as he pressed his hand over Thomas’ mouth.  
“I know, And I’m so proud Thomas, you did so well, you helped our babies grow into wonderful people, you nurtured them enough for the both of us. I’m so proud!” Alexander smiled, his face lit up with the pride that he felt for his husband’s accomplishment.   
Thomas hugged Alex’s legs and sobbed into them, staining the fabric with his tears. Alex hoisted his husband up to his full, towering height then yanked him down by the collar and pressed a deep, loving kiss on Thomas’ lips. The feeling of Alex’s lips again overwhelmed Thomas’ senses, he hadn’t felt his husband in a long time. Thomas lifted Alexander off the ground and peppered kisses all over his face, each connection filled Thomas with excitement and vigor. He just stood there, holding Alexander, taking in his presence, melding into him. Thomas would never let his husband go again.  
“We can finally start our forever, we can watch our kids grow together, just like we’ve always wanted.” With those words Thomas put Alexander down and grabbed his hand.   
They walked to their new home where they would finally spend eternity.


End file.
